A Nice Story

I’m going to tell you a nice story. It’s from the Bible. Now don’t go away, I promise not to preach or evangelize. I hate it when people do that. It’s just a nice story. And I think there something in it from which anyone can learn. You don’t need to know anything about the bible or Jesus, or anything. It’s just a nice story.

You all know this much, that according to the story (remember, you don’t have to believe it) Jesus was crucified up on a cross and died. Then, after being in the tomb for three days, he is supposed to have risen from the dead. And then, after he rose from the dead, he was seen several times by his students-disciples-friends-homies, whatever you want to call them. He came and talked with them and ate with them a few times, and then, according to the story, he ascended up into heaven. This story is about one of the times he came to see his friends before going away.

As the story goes, he helps his friends find a shit-load of fish, and then settles down to eat with them. At first, they didn’t recognize him, but after he sat down with them to eat, they all went like, “Holy crap!! It’s the Lord!!!” so they had a great lunch talking about all that mysterious spiritual crap and who was going to have the best seat, and heaven, and stuff like that and then Jesus takes Peter, who was sort of in charge at this moment, and he asked him, “Peter, do you love me?”

Peter (whose real name was Simon bar Jonah, which means Simon, son of Jonah) was a little taken aback because he thought Jesus knew how he felt and so he answered, “You know I love you!” Peter is the English version of Petros, which is Greek for rock. Before, when he used to hang around with Jesus, before they knew he was anything that special, they called him Cephas, which meant “pebbles”. So when Jesus later changed his name to Peter, it was like a joke–a play on words. Like, before you were pebbles, but now you’re a rock. Anyway, Peter says he does love Jesus, and Jesus looks at him and says, “Feed my sheep.” Now this must have sounded kind of weird to Peter because he was a fisherman, and none too smart of a fisherman either I might add, so this reference to sheep must have made him scratch his head.

Then, Jesus asks Peter again, “Do you love me?” And Peter, who must have thought that this whole crucifixion thing must have affected his hearing says, “You know I love you.” And Jesus says again, “Feed my sheep.”

Then Jesus asks Peter a third time, “Peter, do you love me?” And Peter, who is really upset by now, says, “Lord, you know all things. You know that I love you.” And Jesus tells him to feed his sheep again, and then they all have keep eating a great lunch that couldn’t be beat and then go off home.

Now I used to think this was a very weird story. There are some ministers and priests who say Jesus was giving Peter a chance to make up for denying him three times by affirming him three times. If you saw JC Superstar, you know how that went down. But those priests and ministers are wrong. I know, because I read the story in Greek. Greek is a great language. It is very, very precise. And in those long ago days, it was the language of business. Everybody spoke Greek. There were so many different languages throughout the known world that it was the one binding thread. In Greek, this conversation is a little bit different.

When Jesus asks Peter, do you love me, he uses the word, “Agapao” which means absolute, unconditional, not counting the cost, whatever it takes, love. It is the way most parents love their children. It is certainly the way most pets love their humans–even our cat, Gabby. So Jesus is asking Peter do you love me, unconditionally, totally, completely, willing to make any sacrifice, without hesitation? And when Peter answers, he uses the word “Philao” which means the type of love you have for your friends. We would probably translate that word as, “like”. So, to translate it better, Jesus asks do you love me, and Peter answers, Lord, you know I like you.

Then Jesus asks again, “But Peter, do you LOVE me? (again with the agapao word) . Peter answers back again, “Lord, you know I LIKE you (again with the philao word). Then, the third and final time Jesus asks Peter, he says, “But Peter, do you LIKE me? (now Jesus has switched to the same word that Peter used–philao). Peter answers and says that Jesus should know that he LIKES him.

Now what does all this mean? It means, Jesus is willing to drop to Peter’s level. Okay, Pebbles, you can’t give me unconditional love, then I’ll take what you got and work with that. That makes me feel a hell of a lot better. It means I don’t have to be a fanatic. It means just be the best you can.

And on a non-religious side it means, maybe we shouldn’t expect people to give us more than they are able to give. Maybe we need to just look at each other and accept what is offered, and work with it. Maybe your kid, or your wife, or your partner, or your friend can’t give you all you want from them right now, then be happy with what they CAN give you and work with that, and the rest will come in time. I mean, if it was good enough for Jesus…

According to tradition and the stories, Peter went on to be the most devoted of all the twelve, choosing to die by being crucified upside down, because he didn’t feel worthy of being crucified in the same way Jesus was. If you ask me, that’s a little twisted but hey, I wasn’t there–at least I don’t think I was.

So I just think this is a nice story. It doesn’t have to be true. Maybe it’s just in the book to teach me a lesson, or make me realize that I don’t have to be perfect and to love myself for who I am and quit grieving for who I’m not. Maybe it’s just there to help me be a little more accepting of the people in my life I love. I don’t know. I don’t have any answers. I just think it’s a nice story.